What is PDA anyway?

I know that the initials PDA can mean a lot of different things- don't search it on google images for that very reason. In autism and our world, it stands for pathological demand avoidance.

There is a lot of professionally written information about PDA available on the PDA society website https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/ with a section about what PDA is here https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/what-is-PDA/about-pda

I started there when we first began suspecting PDA in our son. I took a long time reading through their information, comparing it with other available information (national autistic society http://www.autism.org.uk/about/what-is/pda.aspx, Me myself and PDA https://memyselfandpda.com/what-is-pda/ to name a couple of sources). These were useful, and made me realise that all of these symptoms actually amounted to something other than a paranoid parent, or the need for more enforced parenting courses.
This said, the most useful information I found anywhere was that from other parents and people with PDA themselves.

There are many social media groups and YouTube channels where people talk about PDA (I don't feel comfortable sharing the groups here as they have strict membership criteria to maintain the security of their members, and the YouTube channels also vary).

So, from my experiences, PDA is the constant, over-riding need to avoid doing anything you have to or need to do, especially if someone else has asked/needs/wants you to do it, regardless of what it is or why, along with the inability to verbalise your thoughts adequately to be understood, leading to high levels of anxiety and frustration. PDA is the anxiety led need to be in control. If a person with PDA is not in control then their anxiety level rises, which can manifest itself in a variety of avoidance strategies and escalations.
PDA and autism are co-morbid (exist commonly) with other conditions as well, such as ADHD, sensory processing difficulties, depression, and many more. Just because you or your child may have a diagnosis of PDA, do not assume that means that PDA accounts for everything.

There are many useful books available on autism and PDA, one I would thoroughly recomment you work through with your child is the ASD workbook.  This explains about autism and the different profiles, as well as having exercises to do together to help your child realise it is not all doom and gloom. I would recommend you read ahead and prepare for questions that come up in order to help your child.