There no longer is a Miss G. It is now Mr M and uses the pronouns it/it's.
Mr M told us aged 4 that it wasn't a girl, it was a boy and the chosen name was one we used at the time when it chose.
Then time went on and Mr M didn't comment on anything regarding feeling different about its body, but we noticed it was having difficulty with personal care. Being undressed seemed to be causing a response and soon Mr M became unable to wash. This is partly sensory from having autism but mostly due to gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia.
Mr M has been on the waiting list to get some help with it's gender dysphoria since January 2022 and still we wait.
Because of PTSD caused by early childhood trauma, Mr M is unable to be around needles. This is an instant problem when talks of transitioning evolve because blood tests and testosterone injections involve needles.
We have tried to get Mr M help from the school nurse, child social worker, early help worker, child in need plan worker, paediatrician, GP, private havening practitioner, child and adolescent mental health, NSPCC and mind. Noone has been able to offer any help at all.
Mr M is behind in it's regular injection schedule for HPV and boosters. There is nothing we can do.
Over the past three years we have legally changed Mr M's name from Miss G to Mr M, found a community in our local mermaids group, met other people who are trans gender of different ages, been to many pride events (and there will be many more to come) and tried to help Mr M find a place where it feels it fits in. Mr M has difficulty with feeling like it fits in anywhere and gets down about this. Sadly the world is not very welcoming or accessible for a wheelchair user with autism who is trans gender. There are a lot of things to try and fit in with there.
We have open discussions about all topics, nothing is safe from being talked about (unless confidential) in our home from feetfinder to packers we talk about it all. We hope that by being open and not embarrassed or judgmental, that we can support our children and young people to feel safe and valued.
Mr M is currently at an age where big decisions are being made about its future and what that looks like. A scary time for all of us, but especially difficult for Mr M. Decisions have always been a sticky point and the enormity of these doesn't help.
We are hoping Mr M will find some likeminded individuals to build relationships with in the near future but at present we are keeping it as open as we can.
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